A Running Tally of Metaphysical Phenomena

Hey, I just blazed past 100 posts back there.

Only took me three and a half years.

Maybe there’s a better word than “blazed”…

For some weeks now (and if you keep up with Kirsten’s blog at all, you already know this), I’ve gotten up on Saturday morning and been immediately seized with the itch to go cook something. So far, it’s yielded three batches of increasingly tasty bagels, a batch of strawberry-rhubarb-apple tarts (the most successful experiment thus far),

 a chocolate mandarin cheesecake (runner-up on taste, but tragically ugly), and some delicious spring-summery limeade. I really should be a better journalist and keep a record of these weekly kitchen experiments, but I usually forget to take pictures until it’s pretty much done, and there’s not a whole lot of point by that time.

Today’s creation, I made up on my own. Kirsten requested something with ice cream. It’s been sunny and warm-ish (in various points in the 70s) here the last week or so, and we figured it was about time to embrace the upcoming summer and make something appropriate for the climate. It’s not a gourmet thing by any means, really as much a combination of grocery store junk foods as anything else, but it was fun, and it was tasty, and you might want to make something like it at some point.

For your enjoyment, I present this week’s experiment:

Brownie Redbottom Ice Cream Cake

This was the product of a few minutes of brainstorming, some crossed fingers, and the assurance that comes with having only a few ingredients, all of which are good on their own. I think the combination of fruit and chocolate is underrated, and I also think that frozen fruit deserves some love. If you think that sounds like a bad idea, I can appreciate that, but if you’d like to try it yourself, read on.

You’ll need one pound of strawberries, two kiwis, a carton of ice cream (I used brownie moose tracks. It was originally going to be just vanilla with fudge topping, but this made it easier.), and a plain old cheap fudge brownie mix.

Start by mixing up the brownie mix. If you have one of these paddle-looking folding attachments, use that instead of the whisk because you don’t want to mix too much air into brownies or they’ll be less dense, which, of course, is no good for brownies. (Cheesecake, on the other hand…) You already know how to make a batch of brownies from a mix. Just do that.

Cook the batter in a springform pan with shortening or butter or something on the bottom to keep it from sticking.

While the brownie bottom is baking, pull a few of the strawberries out of the box and set them aside…

…then purée the remainder in the blender for as long as it takes to get all of the chunks out.

Before:

And after:

Set the ice cream out on the counter, and go ahead and clean up the mixing bowl, spatula, etc. while the brownies are cooking. You should have enough time, and your wife will like you better if the kitchen ends up looking like you were never there. Trust me.

Once the brownies are done, let them cool for just a couple of minutes, and then rough ‘em up pretty good with a fork.

Once you have them all ready to soak up a bunch of goodness, go ahead and pour the strawberry purée right on top of the batch of brownies. It won’t really soak in—unless you got some crazy strawberries, the purée will be too thick—but that’s OK. Spread it out evenly, and if your ice cream is pretty soft by now, go ahead and spread that on top.

Unless the ice cream is completely melted, it’s going to push the strawberry puree around so that it’s not as even as it was a minute ago. The only way I could think of to get around that would be to freeze the whole thing and then take it back to put the ice cream on it. And really, I wasn’t trying to spend the whole day making something that wasn’t really meant to be a showpiece in the first place. It’s all going the same place anyway, right?

Once the ice cream is on as evenly as you can get it and you’ve smoothed it out…

…put the strawberry and kiwi slices (or whatever fruit you want) on the top as fancy-like as you can make it…

…and toss it in the freezer for a little while. When it comes out, you can take the outside off the pan…

…and cut the cake into wedges [not pictured] to serve it. Enjoy!

Back with two of the best weeklies yet!

Here’s Greta a week ago sitting up all by herself! And she’s come a very long way in the week since we took this one! At 22 weeks, she was sitting up for a minute at a time or less, but now she sits up as long as she feels like it. She really only tips over when she lunges for her toes so she can chew on them.

And here we are today. It’s been mighty bright and sunshiny around these parts of late, and poor Greta takes after her dad and deals pretty poorly with it in the eyeballs department. We had to get her these sunglasses, which she’s so proud of. 100% stylin’, 0% UV A and B rays in the eyes. Fabulous!

One of the cool things about working where I do is actually a small sticker. Any job where they give you stickers must be a cool job, but this one is especially useful.* It’s blue this year, and it was purple last year. I’m hoping for something bright and obnoxious when the new ones come out next month, but I don’t think they open it up to much of a public vote. The sticker is called a Flexpass, and when I stick it to the back of my ID badge, it lets me hop on any King County public transport and ride for free, any time, any day of the week. The idea is to cut down somewhat on Seattle area traffic by making it easier and more cost effective for people to commute by bus. Most people still don’t, but parking is never something I have to contend with at work, and that’s very nice.

My usual morning work routine starts at 7:35, when I lock up the front door and walk about a quarter mile or so (eight brisk minutes) to my bus stop. The 221 comes at 7:52 (I put a little buffer in there just in case), I flash my work ID badge, and I ride to the stop just past the 520 overpass on NE 51st St. The total ride is about 8 minutes, and the stop is directly in front of my office, so it’s a quick trip. If I had my ‘druthers, I’d prefer a ride that was just a little longer, because I usually read on the bus, and 8 minutes of riding plus the reading time on the way to the bus stop (Yes, I read on the sidewalk. Please don’t give me a hard time about it.) and before the bus comes only gets me through a few pages a day.

On the way home, I have the same driver every day at 4:37. We have a very similar script each day, wherein I say hello, he says hey, he announces “Old Redmond Rd. (he emphasizes it like that) halfway through the ride, and then when I get off, I say thanks, he says “you bet,” and I say to have a good afternoon. Sometimes he says “you too,” and sometimes I’m pretty much off the bus and onto the sidewalk before I really get it out of my mouth. Because, you know, some days I’m just not polite, I guess. Then I cross the street, open my book, and autopilot my way home.

I’ve left work at 4:00 instead of 4:30 two times. Once was without incident, and the other involved One of Those Bus Drivers. See, there are a few things you can do to be an annoying bus driver, including, but not limited to, the following:

• When there’s one person at a stop, don’t stop the bus in front of the person.**
• Make anyone who asks for change feel like a complete idiot—and do it loudly— just because they didn’t know that you need exact change on the bus.
• Do jackrabbit starts before people are settled into their seats just to emphasize that you’re running the show.
• Don’t say hello back to people or accept/return wishes for a good day.
• Sigh and condescend your way through helping anyone with questions about the route or about the bus system in general.

I’m just helping you all out here in case you become bus drivers at some point and you don’t (or do; who knows?) want to be the behind-the-wheel That Guy.
Anyway, the 4:04 PM driver on the weekday 221 is not nearly as cool as my friend on the 4:37. That’s my point.

Today brings a new entry to my repertoire of bus-related knowledge and experiences. Two weeks a month, I do music for the little kiddos at church (TONS of fun! I should really take pictures some time.), and the schedule is such that it’s really difficult for Kirsten and Greta to leave with me at 8:40 without completely jumping in the middle of Greta’s schedule and making things really difficult.*** Now, as everyone knows, you can love Jesus all you want, but he won’t love you back unless you go to church. (Basic theology.) Ergo, in the interest of the salvation of my wife and daughter, I’ve started taking the bus. Other than carrying a guitar case to the bus stop, which isn’t a big deal, really, the only down side to this is that the Sunday bus schedule for the 221 (same bus as I take to work, conveniently enough), I can show up either 10 minutes late or an hour early. Of the two, early is obviously better, but it means a lot of tuning up and getting ready. Fortunately, the kids start filtering in a little bit ahead of the actual start time, so I get to hang out with them for a few minutes, which is what I’m going to go do now.

I finished another book recently, so I have two more book reports for you soon, and Gretupdates as well, so stay tuned.

Kent

* Microsoft does give out Gold Stars, but they’re not stickers.
** There’s a little covered shelter at the bus stop, and then about eight feet to the right, there’s the “actual” bus stop. Really, though, if you’re driving, and there’s just one person waiting, and he’s out of the drizzle in the shelter thing, don’t power trip and insist on putting him in line by pulling eight feet forward. It’s dumb.
*** Because messing with an infant’s schedule is the nuclear option for time management. It will get you where you need to be pretty close to when you need to be there, but the cost is just unethically big.

OK, I have to show you this. Greta has a sweet habit of getting all adorable and irresistible and social right before bed. She also has a habit of turning it all off as soon as we get the camera out. But last night, we caught rare and never-before-seen footage of the Greta in her natural habitat, hamming it up like she usually does before bed. It’s a little, um, lightly edited, let’s say, but anyway, just watch.

“Aw, dad, five more minutes!”.

What a week! Things have been mighty festive and celebratory around here lately. Kirsten’s birthday was on Thursday, and we celebrated for three straight days! I think she’d probably enjoy having the honor or telling party stories and showing off pictures herself, so I will just point you to her blog for all the juicy details. Go for the pictures, stay for the friendship.

I do have updated Barley items for you, though.

19 weeks:

20 weeks:

It is possibly an indicator of what the world now looks like, practically, that my conversations with Kirsten have included this sort of thing recently:

K: Hey, Greta did X today.
K: Wow, how cool! Now I’m (previous number+X) things behind on my blog!

I think this could be an indicator of a problem. I don’t know, maybe I’ve stayed true to my roots, blog-wise, and it’s all a very sincere outlet for me and a news place for ones and ones of people the world over and all of that. I just can’t shake the feeling, though, that that sort of talk is a gateway to being the guy with his Bluetooth earpiece in all the time. (May it never be so [it won't be].)

I also never thought I’d be the person who would use the baby excuse to absolve myself of laziness when it comes to keeping up with my writing, but, well, you have a baby as cute and interactive as Greta and the accompanying lifestyle changes and see how you do.

Anyway, realizing that

1. I’m behind on news, pictures, and everything else,
2. acknowledging that you’re behind on your blog, on your blog is completely de rigeur, blogs relying as they do on either narcissism or self-discipline (or both) for their maintenance,
3. that sort of apologizing is therefore kind of annoying, and
4. there’s really not a lot to be done for it at this point except a catch-all catch-up,

here I am. Today I have the following topics for your regalement:

• Glass blowing, jacketswag, and a boat!
• Books! Spies! Intrigue!
• Words for many points!
• Round things with holes!
• Ambirollasaurus!
• Miscellania!

There is no logical flow to be had here.

First of all, timing. Timing, folks, is what we have here. Timing to find the one open writer position at Microsoft and have it actually work out in the middle of company-wide layoffs. I’m so, so grateful for that! And on top of that, the other great bit of timing was getting in the door just as the team had all kinds of morale stuff planned. There was breakfast one day (“Giant muffins! I’ve never seen one of those! Let’s all, ALL of us, stampede downstairs to the conference room with the skinny door all at once and make a line an hour long!”), and then an afternoon of glass blowing, which was super fun and artsy and inspiring. Then the organization-wide all-hands meeting with free fleeces for everyone. And then today, our cruise on Lake Washington on the historic steamship Virginia V. You know, on a boat.

(I left my flippy floppies at home, but I could have worn them.) It was in the low 70s and sunny and clear. All the better to get a glimpse of Bill G’s house on the lake

and Howard Schultz’s place (he’s the guy who started Starbuck’s), which I can’t find a picture of but which was more impressive on the outside, in my opinion. And finally, this coming Thursday, an event that touches on the quintessence of tech geeks everywhere, even writers like our group, a rented-out movie theater for an early screening of the new Star Trek movie. I’ve never gotten into Star Trek personally, but I have nothing at all against it, and I’m sure I’d probably enjoy the show if I had the time for it. I think the movie looks like a lot of fun, so I’m looking forward to it. It probably sounds like the money people behind our team are a bunch of profligate spenders with no grasp on the reality of the world outside Windows, but in fact, these are actually smaller in scale than some teams’ morale events in the past, and our group is really on the ball with budgets in general, so we don’t have to worry about frivolizing our way to sweeping layoffs. It isn’t like this all year, either. We’ve hit a bunch of milestones recently (I say “we,” but I really mean “they,” since I wasn’t around for it), and I guess this is just a natural time to get a little bit of a breather. It’s been a fun way to get to know some of my coworkers, and the apple crisp on the boat was really good too!

After reading through the Bourne trilogy again (very, very slowly, over a long time), I was recently happy to find a legend of the spy genre, The Spy Who Came In from the Cold by John LeCarré.

People Who Know What They’re Talking About consider this to be the ultimate spy thriller. As someone who is very, very inexperienced with tales of espionage, I don’t feel remotely qualified to make a call on that claim, but I will say that it was very good. It had one of the best characteristics of a tale of deception: I had no idea who was telling the truth and what was motivating who to do what. Not even at the end, really, which is maybe the only thing that disappointed me a little. But it’s worth reading. Very “Modern Literature of the 60s,” with characters who are morally complicated, a gritty world that doesn’t romanticize intelligence work, etc. It felt just [this] reactionary to the thrillers of a generation before, where the good guys were GOOD and the bad guys were BAD and they wore t-shirts to that effect in the opening chapters that described their vestments in great detail. All that being said, it really was a fine piece of literature, and I recommend it. The courtroom portions were thrilling. I have nothing specific lined up to read next, but I’d love any suggestions you may have.

I have Scrabble set up at work now. The score sheet says “2341″ (my office number) on one side and “Everyone Else” on the other. BUT yesterday, I caught Brittany (my coworker, who was the establised half of 2341 before I invaded) giving tips to Tats from across the hall. So she is cut out, and I will now proceed to go it alone. Wish me luck. I thought about taking Pandemic in to play (current events!), but I think it’s maybe a little too complex and time consuming, so it will probably stay on the shelf at home.

On a positive note, though, Kirsten might actually be interested in playing it now that the theme has become a little more pertinent. We’ll see.

Hey, bagels! They’re not that difficult! Last Saturday, I convinced Kirsten to let me clutter up the kitchen, so now I can report on these. It looks like this when you make them. To start, you just mix up a normal, basic bread dough, knead it kind of a long time, let it rise, and cut or roll it into fairly even pieces. They rise a little longer, and then here’s where the bagelness comes in. To start the shape out, you just roll each dough ball into a snake that’s a little longer than the width of both hands.

Then you lay it across the back of one hand and put the two ends over your palm.

You knead and twist them together, and poof! you have a bagel shape.

It takes a little practice to get it right—I never did quite get it—but after that, you let them sit a little while longer, boil them for a minute on each side…

…and then bake them for ten minutes on each side. And there they are.

These were delicious, and I highly recommend giving this a try some time. It’s not nearly as intimidating or difficult as I expected at first, and they were great, particularly with Alouette Garlic and Herb spread. Mmmmmmm!

I’m usually two weeks behind on Greta’s weeklies before I get them posted here, and today is no exception. Sorry about that. As you can see from the more recent one (18 weeks), she has started to locomote somewhat while on her back. We stepped out of the room for a minute last Saturday, and when we came back, this is how she’d positioned herself. She handled it like she handles nearly everything lately, which was to smile about it and tell us how great it was. She was having a good old time. The point, though, is that in addition to scooting a couple of feet sideways, she has begun to ROLL!! Back to front and front to back, says her mom. I still haven’t seen the ambiroller in action myself, which is unfortunate, but if Kirsten says it’s going on, it’s going on, and I’m just biding my time until I can take pictures or video of it happening. I will post them when we have them. Stay tuned on that.

17 weeks, and she’s looking at her friend Mr. Snail, who she LOVES.

And here we are at 18 weeks, making a break for it.

Alright, that’s good for the time being. I’ll try to jump back on the next time something cool happens and go on and on about it. Hope everyone’s well, and do remember to take care of yourselves, won’t you?

Kent